January is the month for Aspirational Lives. New Year’s Resolutions, goals, big changes and all the jazz, commitments designed to inch us closer from how we are to how we want to be. I haven’t put up a “2013 Resolutions” post because, frankly, 2013 just pitched in of its own accord, and like most things…
Humor
Affirmations for Crazy Crafters
Last night, as I was pinning together the two halves of some toddler long johns I was sewing from the felted-wool sleeves an up-cycled Norwegian sweater I picked up at the thrift store, I thought three things. One: “If someone described to me the action I am currently engaged in and used the term ‘up-cycled’…
The Propaganda of the Four Season Chart
You know how those elementary-school season charts always show the four seasons divided into nice equal pie-slices? Usually the season-slices are accompanied by a seasonally appropriate deciduous tree: leaves turning color in fall, bare and snow-studded in winter, leaf budding and flowering in spring and in full green verdancy in summer. The important part is that each season…
The Terrible Tragedy of the Healthy Eater
I know you. We have a lot in common. You have been doing some reading and now you are pretty sure everything in the grocery store and your kitchen cupboards is going to kill you. Before Your Healthy Eating Internet Education: I eat pretty healthy. Check it out: whole grain crackers, veggie patties, prawns, broccoli….
The $332 Fantasy Facial (Or: An Anthropological Expedition to the Mall)
“If you get nothing else, please, please just get the moisturizer,” the overly plumped and overly plucked sales-cultist implores me. “You know, these are the years that really count for your skin.” The moisturizer is $75 for a two-ounce jar. The jar, it must be said, is a very pretty sandblasted green. It’s worth at least…
Notes From A Synthetic Environment
For the past five days I’ve been living in an unreal, unearthly limbo. I’m at a professional conference, in a 34 story hotel, in Chicago. I could easily have no idea what time it is. I certainly have no idea what the weather is like. My menus over the past few days read something like this:…
Don't Buy These 5 Williams-Sonoma Agrarian Products
Last week Williams-Sonoma branched out from French dishwear, excellent knives and seasonal high-end cocoa mix into urban homesteading gear. With the launch of their Agrarian line, Williams-Sonoma now sells gardening gear, chicken and bee keeping supplies, seeds, edible plants, fruit trees and preserving supplies. Some people in the hardcore DIY community (you know who you…
Escaping The Cult of Busy
Note to Self: Life on Garden Time does not mean Life on Frantic Time. “Oh, I’ve just been so busy.” “With all the kid’s activities, I’ve just been so busy!” “With the new job, I’ve just been so busy!” “I don’t know what it is, it’s just crazy busy right now.” “Wow, I wish I…
You Know You're A Veggie Gardener If…
You go to Costco and buy one thing – Sluggo in bulk – and ask for 8 large cardboard boxes to take it home in so you can smother more lawn. You frequent a horse stable even though you have no interest in riding horses. You have a ridiculous multi-component compost hierarchy to handle kitchen scraps and you assume…
Worst Soil Amendment For Tomatoes?
Rachel Shadoan is a writer of exceptional wit. I know because she posted a story of gardening loss on the NW Edible Facebook page that was both so terrible and so hilarious that I read it twice. I asked for her permission to share her tale of tomato-growing woe (and lessons learned) here. This story appeared originally on Rachel’s…
Seed Organization For Gardeners With Too Many Seeds
On Monday I talked about seeds for beginners. Well, after a season or two of growing from seed you may become (like many of the commenters on Monday’s post) a Gardener With Too Many Seeds. You have become a G.W.T.M.S. when you have file boxes dedicated to your seeds and you debate with yourself every season…
3 Myths About Chickens, Debunked
Chickens are not what you expect. Now don’t get me wrong, I love my hens. I love their enthusiastic productivity, their damn near egg-a-day fecundity. I love their retirement plan (soup) almost as much. But there are a lot of myths about chickens floating around out there, and they deserved to be debunked. Myth One:…